Endings
Saturday I graduated. It is an odd and crazy thought that I have graduated with a Master’s degree. For the first time in twenty years I will not begin classes in the fall. At the moment I am finding myself confused and excited for the weeks ahead. The thought of not having homework in the evenings is finally setting in as my husband is looking at reviews on a DVD player we just bought and I just finished writing thank you letters for an interview I had yesterday and will write thank yous for graduation gifts tomorrow. It is amazing how one fills time when there is no scheduled events.
Graduation was somewhat of an event that I want to remember for several reasons so I commemorate it in writing. On Saturday my husband and I woke up early to get family and head to the Bob Devany Sports Center. It was a crowd of people as over 2700 graduates filled the basketball courts to commence our lives. I was a bit confused with all of it except when the speaker began he made me really think about what a privilege it was to be sitting there. I cannot understand the magnitude of opportunities that I have being in America and being at UNL in particular. I then sat through other niceties and with a small tear stood up when the graduate school was called. The change of last name with marriage left me third in line and second to receive my diploma (we go two at a time). The next two hours of sitting in the folding chairs was kind of a blur as college after college was called. Then Arts and Sciences, the largest college was called and my husband stood up along with over 700 others to receive his diploma. It was exciting for us to graduate on the same day, but the opportunity to give him a hug and kiss after his receiving of his diploma was an incredible event. Although over 7000 people could see, it was as if it were the two of us experiencing this grand event together even from across the court.
While the event took a long time and we were grouchy at the end, the event itself was one worth remembering. We did it, yet the thousands of people around really made me realize that it was not possible without those around. Without friends, family, advisers, instructors, supervisors, and peers. Ultimately, it made me realize more and more that it was impossible to do any of this without those God placed in the path for Him to support me through. It would not have been possible.
Now I venture into the unknown. It took a lot of trust today to turn down a great job offer, knowing that it is not where my family needs to be at the moment even though I have no sure position that I know of. I am living more and more each day out of trust and knowing about not being in control of my life and the importance of following truth over rationalism at times when rationalism is much easier.
For now, I live in the moment of ending, but am embarking on a new beginning, a beginning that is unknown and confusing, but one that is to occur quicker than I know.
